are tectonic plates dishwasher safe?
idk but they’re perfect for a continental breakfast
don’t act like just because it’s gonna be october that means you’re gonna go spend late nights in the forest with orange leaves, hoodies, and a significant other when we all know you’re gonna lay on the couch and watch Halloweentown High on Disney Channel
hey remember that law i forget exactly how it goes but its something along the lines of ‘if you murder someone you go to jail’ whatever happened to that? is that still a thing
a real job? you mean, like, an internship at the white house?
okay, well what about the national democratic party?
what about interning at the united nations?
wow damn it’s almost like our economy functions on stealing labour from hardworking young people, regardless of whether their jobs are “real” or not
do you ever get in those moods where you don’t know how to feel and everything kinda feels mixed up and you’re just sitting there alone in your room trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong with you
- iPhone user: I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
- Android user: Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
- iPhone user: I just like this pho-
- Android user: The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*
filling out a job application
“are you available for a Skype interview?”
Becoming a cold hearted bitch wasn’t really what I planned to do with my life but here I am